sa-i dau drumul soarelui in viata mea...

Am hotarit ca gata cu negrul si gata cu intunericul, ca chiar daca cerul e sumbru e necesar sa treci doar peste nouri si il vei vedea albastru , in toata frumusetea sa!!
Merci mult proiectului in care lucrez-TtT(Train the Trainers), m-a invatat mult la capitolul flexibilitate si stress management... Desi mai mult pe drumul asta de mers am inteles ca nu mai pot trai asa ca pina acum ca vreau sa fiu fericita si voi fi indiferent de piedici. Vreau sa creez, vreau sa calatoresc, vreau sa cunosc oameni, vreau sa invat limbi, vreau atitea lucruri si totusi nu le fac, e problema mea, e ceva in capul meu care imi incurca si banuiesc eu ce e... sunt toate "invataturile" oamenilor ce m-au inconjurat toata viatza, sunt stereotipuri, frica de esec, complexe si multe alte gunoaie in mintea mea.... Am incercat sa lucrez cu mintea mea si sa le sterg din ea insa n-am reusit, se vede ca cu anii au prins radacini acolo....imi ramine cred ca atunci doar sa nu ascult mintea ci inima, ea stie ce ma poate face fericita , iar daca si voi avea parte de suferinta, esecuri, pai asta e viata, nimanui nu i-a reusit sa ocoleasca toate insuccesele. Cum a zis cineva succesul nu e determinat de faptul ca nu cazi niciodata ci de faptul cit de repede reusesti sa te scoli. Chiar cred in asta ...
Vreau sa arunc toate nimicurile din casa, sa fac ordine, sa deschid larg geamurile, sa le spal( stiati ca in mai multe culturi se socoate ca geamurile acumuleaza energie negativa si o mentin, indata ce le speli dispare tot negativul) si sa fac tot ce-mi va zice inima, sa incep a fi fericita!

born to be happy...

Exhausted...sleepy...in doubts...nervious...

Soon comes TtT which means "Train the Trainers" conference, that i am organizing together with another 6 young people. They are so fine but still so difficult...so am i....so much work to do...so much people will be there...but this is what worries me the least...
Now the biggest dilema for me is to apply for the last leadership position that are opened in AIESEC or not... It fits very well my future plans, and i really want to have a team that i will coordinate, BUT....
i feel so tired of all this rush, and meetings and stuff to do... i need a brake...i need fresh air and emotions...i need to change the environment at least for a while...
WHAT direction to choose???
I only hope that if i try to listen to my heart...and to the signs of life i'll the find the right way....

Hope to meet you,blog ,the next time more determined...

life intensity....

I'm so tired, but know i feel how the life palpitate in my veins, and i'm happy.
Today i tried to use the power of "atraction" or projection and it worked, you know when you believe, when you really want miracles in you life you just have to make them!
Also i noticed today one more time my weakness in controling my emotions or "emotional inteligence", it's good never to forget that you still have to work a lot, and never stop improving yourself...
Had a long day, with many activites, lot of work done, but lots of work still to do... so tomorrow if i wake up,the life will be also intense and full of beauty and challenges... see ya!

inside-outside:were is the response?

I really missed writing here my thoughts for all this time... if you ask me what i did all this time, i 'll respond: all and nothing at all... i lived an intense and interesting life but it was like usually it hapens to me only a cycle, and know it begins one more time...
I fall in love, in general it is something typical for me to fell in love fast and to understand that it was a mistake and forget also fast...i read a book that made me change a little bit and every time i remember what it says i become free at least for some moments("Veronica decides to die" by Paulo Coelho)...i had solved some family problems and celebrated my friend's birthday, spend some days relaxing,walking in parks, listening some good music(jazz)...it seems to be interesting and full of activities but now i look back and what i have inside?? still sorrow ....how to find the way, to live my life ascending not only making circles...
I know that i have nothing to complain of... but still there is a problem...and not only one... i am afraid to live, to love, to make mistakes, afraid of what people can think about me, lack of self confidence... But today is another day and every day is a new begining, i'll take it as a new start for me... Today i'll make anything to be near the person i care about, i'll do what i think is important for me, i'll make somebody smiling and at least 1 hour i'll spend doing the things i love doing... this will be my first step in trying to heal my disease...
what will you do TODAY??